Whose the Daddy?

I got my paternity results back from the baby today.  The twins dad is not Azalea's dad. I am glad because he is such a deadbeat and true asshole.  I cried because I was so sure, I cried because maybe Azalea's real dad might be a true man and help us. That two week window that I got pregnant was crazy. I was drinking pretty heavily.  I contacted a potential father today and he said he had a vasectomy four years ago. I don't believe him, he'll be getting papers soon. The other guy, I have no clue where he is at. I'm working on it tho.

I told Azalea today, I might not know who your daddy is but your mommy is the best. She smiled and I hugged her and quietly sobbed for a moment.

It's really hard playing this strong role.  I stop myself from crying alot but sometimes, like now, it's my time of the month and i just gotta let it go.

I have been wanting to get into other subjects on the blog. But, I am scared that my emotions will take over and then I'll just be a shell of a woman going through the functions of life and potentially relapse.

I'm gonna go pamper myself. I splurged and bought a $4.00 box of hair dye. My hair is falling out excessively and the darker it is the less noticeable it is!! I'm gonna dye my hair, then I'm gonna snuggle in bed with my Azalea and watch a movie in bed. Yep!! G Night!