Friday, August 15, 2014

The REASONS I Live and Breathe

1996-I had my 1st daughter Marissa at 19. Simpy beautiful, my grandmother said she was Snow White. Light skin, red lips and cold black hair. My Mexiasian.  She inspired me to go enroll in college and  "Be Somebody".

2003-My son  followed 7 years later, he who was born with diaphragmatic hernia (a congenital birth defect) http://www.cherubs-cdh.org/.  My mom says he was born that way because I was morbidly obese when I gave birth. Okay I know you wanna know-- I was 320 lbs at that point-- My highest was 350lbs, My son was given a 20% chance of survival. My little Ben- As I reflect I honestly have never felt so much internal pain in my life-- my heart was just full of throbbing pain, it was to much to even breathe.  The tears-- oh the tears. I tried to live at Childrens' Mercy Hospital, www.childrensmercy.org but I had Marissa to take care of too! It was hard. Any mom familiar with the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) knows the pain!!

2011-I was done- I was super chubby and done. NOPE God had other plans! I had twins 9 years later! Belecia and Vincent (AKA Belle and Pappas). Talk about a surprise! I had Gastric Bypass Surgery in 2008. YEAH. I had lost nearly 100 lbs and I bled for 2 years straight I had huge fibroid tumors and I knew I was closed for business. They warned me--you will become more fertile. No Lie. I got TWINKIES!!

2014-I was on the IUD Mirena. God says Diane let me slap you on the head and bless you with another one of my children, She really wants you to be her new mommy. Azalea! Azalea was born on April 2nd of this year!  This little girl gave me a run for my money, my most painful birth. I took an epidural for all my births. The medicine just didn't kick in!! If I knew how this felt I would of stopped at one! Nahh.  This little girl has the blackest full head of hair!  Gorgeous. My lil sister Patty says it's her baby! We all do!!

I haven't mentioned the father of the children yet.  The father of the 2 oldest children is Big Ben. He is to this day my best friend and biggest supporter.  The "Other" one- the father of the last three is just a person who lives two blocks over and ignores our existence.  Trust and believe I filed for child support-- It trickles in hardly.. He knows he owes. Like diapers fall out of the sky!!  Let me stop...  Just did a paternity test 2 weeks ago for Azalea-- We'll see.I now it his! Yes- my fault-Love is Stupidly Blind!

 I must go to sleep. This house is go go go at 6 am.

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